Well I had a great time, and it was really nice getting to know you. Also, I couldn’t help but notice that you described yourself as a “feminist” on your Hinge profile, which is cool since I’m all for equality. So that means you’re down to pay for your half of the meal, right?

Hey, I’m not a bad guy for suggesting this. I just don’t believe in these societal double standards, much like yourself. You want equal pay in the workplace, and I want equal pay on café lunch dates. If anything, I’m a strong feminist just like you.

I know that women still have a long way to go to reach gender equality, but you all have made amazing strides. So if a woman can almost be elected president, I think that means you all can start getting half the bill. It might not seem like much, but I think it’s one large step that we can both take towards equality.

Again, I had a fun time, and I think you’re a really cool person. But you know, I actually realized that I don’t think that I’m ready for a relationship right now. So I think that I’d just prefer if we split this $20 tab and call it that.

Also, what was your friend from your Hinge profile picture’s name again?