Well, it seems I’ve pulled a bit of a boner move here. I misplaced my signed, first edition copy of Allen Ginsberg’s legendary poem ‘Howl’ and now I need about eighty bucks to replace the ten strip of LSD I had hidden inside of it. The book is likely also worth something I suppose, but my main concern here is the acid.

This all happened a couple days ago. I had microdosed a half tab and was feeling pretty groovy and I figured why not just take the other half, so I did. But I guess I still hadn’t quited peaked from that first hit yet because before too long I was tripping real goddamn hard. I’m talking “I can taste my emotions” hard. I tried smoking a little weed to take the edge off, but that just made me paranoid and want to hide the acid in the book, which was just kind of lying around, to be safe.

But once I thought it was securely stowed away, I decided to wash everything down with fourteen Genesee Lights and frankly I have no idea where the book is or what happened with the rest of my night. I did wake up with more glitter on my genitals than usual, however, so I do have some theories.

I’m guessing that I attempted to camouflage the book using elementary school art supplies, which would explain why it’s currently so hard to locate. Far more likely though is that in my trippy brain I was just really digging some colorful glitter and that it is in no way related to the book’s hidden location. 

I already talked to my guy and he said he’s almost out of the good shit I bought last time so we need to raise this cash fast. Oh, and also if anyone finds my copy ‘Howl,’ I’m sure the drugs are gone by now but I guess I wouldn’t mind if you returned the book to me. There is no reward.