Personally, I’m sick of all these boring erectile dysfunction pills that get your blood flowing but don’t do a thing for your taste buds. Why is it that every time I want to take the D-train to Fuck City my only option is choking down a bland, chalky boner enhancer?
If you donante to my campaign, then together we can pioneer a new frontier in the erotic sciences: an E.D. pill that gets your sex life back on track and tastes delicious, too!
In this modern age, there’s no reason that we should be restricted to dick medicine that tastes like cardboard flavored nothing. We should make E.D pills that come in a whole spectrum of flavors, with one that fits for every sexual situation. Maybe we can make one taste like meatloaf for those olde timey missionary sex nights with the wife. Or how about for an erotic trist on a Carribean beach? We can make a pill tastes like a banana daiquiri and will make you fuck like a wild bonobo.
Hey, we’ve already managed to make E.D. medicine that’s chewable. Let’s take that next step and just go full Flintstones vitamins on the unerect members of the world. Unlike those vitamins, however, these tabs are actually going to do something.
Once we reach our goal, we should have more than enough to fund our research and manufacturing needs. This will likely include hiring some scientists to handle all the chemistry stuff, professional food critics to check out the taste, and some prostitutes so we know that the pills’ initial purpose is still functional. After all, if it doesn’t even give you a boner then you might as well be eating a real ice cream cake.
With your help, we can make this dream of a tasty erection corrector a very succulent reality. I hope you will be as generous and giving of your money to this campaign as you are of yourself to your companion(s) in the throes of passionate, full-masted intercourse.