Are you sick of swiping through hundreds of profiles trying to find your perfect match? Millions of people like you are ready to give up and just settle for anyone they can tolerate. But other dating platforms are designed for people who cling to the desperate hope of finding someone out of their league. Introducing Humble: the revolutionary new dating app for people who are finally ready to spend the rest of their lives with whatever they can get.
Instead of matching you with hundreds of potential partners to weed through, Humble matches you with one partner based on three categories:
-Gender
-Sexual orientation
-Your Facebook likes
There’s no swiping, no awkward dating. You’re guaranteed to be matched with someone who fits your sexual orientation and who likes at least one thing you do on Facebook, like the New York Yankees, The Big Bang Theory, or Candy Crush Saga. You and your new partner are now contractually committed to each other, for better or worse.
Humble is the ideal dating app for people who dated prolifically through their twenties and are starting to panic as their best years slip by as they approach their late thirties. It’s also perfect if you don’t care about finding someone but feel pressured since all of your friends are getting engaged. Or maybe you just want to be able to afford to live in a city with a crushing housing market and tying the knot with whoever seems like the only option.
We’re raising money to fund a beta version of the Humble app. Your contribution will go towards a team of programmers to design the app and a team of disappointed mothers in telesales who will call their children, asking why she’s the only one of her friends who still doesn’t have grandkids.
If you’re tired of talking to your cat about how your day went; if you feel guilty ordering the combo for two from your favorite Chinese takeout place and eating it alone in one sitting; if you have to go to your younger sister’s wedding in the spring and are going to snap when aunt Cynthia asks when you’ll be getting married, then support Humble today!
Gain early access to the app to get a quick match with some of the least discriminating members of our user base.
113 backers Get one do-over if you don’t like your match.
*New match is not guaranteed to be of greater quality, remember, you’re settling here.
Get matched with one of our founders who are all okay people in their own ways.
(2 out of 3 available)
- Pat handles marketing and enjoys close-up magic
- Drew is in charge of business development and collects anime Funko figurines
- Terry is our lead programmer and a level 6 necromancer (no longer available)