Our town, Haddonford Hills, is in dire need of an upgrade. Celebrities don’t come here, all of the youth move out once they’re eighteen, and tourism is way down. We haven’t had the same draw to our once-bustling downtown area since the Red Lobster closed down.
That’s why our longtime residents have finally decided that enough is enough. Something needs to change in our area because the twenty-eight different corporate store chains that make up our suburban surroundings aren’t cutting it. The solution: upgrade our old CVS into a fresh, new Walgreens.
CVS is just lacking some of the qualities that you can only find at Walgreens. The pharmacists say “Hi” instead of “Hello”. The greeting cards don’t have a bridal showers section. Walgreens points are more coveted than CVS credit. Most importantly, the alcohol selection at Walgreens is far superior than the ones CVS’s with better savings (I have countless Walgreens coupons for 10% off Franzia scattered throughout my purse).
The money we raise will go towards the destruction of the CVS on 3rd and Oakley, where it will be rebuilt as a glorious Walgreens. We will also be allocating some funds to create sparkling new billboards off the thruway to attract those Walgreens Heads from out of state. Your donation is the only thing left needed to bring our strip mall to perfection. Well, that and a Footlocker.
Also, for those wondering, the Walgreens that we’re building will be an OFFICIAL one. I’ve been in contact with Walgreens Headquarters and they were more than enthusiastic about our town raising all the money that they needed to build a store here. Plus they’re offering a deal! All donations by Walgreens card members will receive a coupon for fish oil softgels!
We hope to count on your support to make our town the envy of the tri-county area. Adding a Walgreens will make us the next Williamsburg, New York.