Hey men, do you like smelling like a manly man? You know your lady does! She doesn’t want you smelling like hibiscus and almond milk or some shit, she wants you smelling like a true testosterone fiend. And now you can smell like the manliest man—your grandfather during WWII. That is what we here at Jock Soap are all about.
Jock Soap deodorant is a unique combination of the smell of fear, gun oil, blood, ocean water, and unbathed infantrymen that’s guaranteed to drive the ladies wild and drive Nazis running for the hills. When you walk into that next business deal smelling like a mortar shell fuse, your competitors will piss themselves with cowardice and show their bellies in submission.
Our scent-ologists swabbed the aged uniforms of the 914th Grenadier Regiment in an effort to unlock the secret scent of the greatest smelling generation. We reproduced high testosterone pheromones in our laboratory that replicate the smell of a human confronting their mortality and confronting the reality that they have taken a human life.
Get the upper hand on the basketball court and in the bedroom when you send others’ senses of smell into overdrive, often inciting a fight or flight response not unlike a panic attack. People will be terrified of you but also curious. It’s the perfect anti-perspirant for the dance club or fight club.
Be one of our first backers and we will also send you our sandalwood testiclel wash and our beard oil that smells like a freshly slaughtered elk.